The Eurovision Song Contest
UK National Selection 2007

Contents

 

Introduction

The dust has settled. The rumours about entries by Morrissey and Jarvis Cocker didn't pan out. The UK's potentials are as follows...
The first set of reviews are from listening to the MP3s, the second from the BBC One broadcast. (skip to the televised performances)

This is the first time I have taken a (limited) interest in the contest 'before the big night'. I have downloaded and listened to the six UK entries. My commentary on this forms the first half of this document you are reading now. I was also sent the final French entry.

This, I feel, is about where my involvement should cease. I like to think of the contest as being new and fresh on the night itself, rather than me knowing all of the songs 'by heart'. Because if I did, what point following the contest? I could pick a favourite in May and be done with it. And that would be a tragedy. Well, maybe not a tragedy, but it'd be a shame...

What I would be very interested in after the contest is in hearing a selection of national vote songs that were not chosen. Like I wrote last year about the cute sisters from Nantes - did they watch the contest and think "OMG! Our performance would have been way better than this!"? Well, I didn't get to hear their performance on France3 (PAL/SÉCAM issues) but I think it'd have been hard to enter a worse song...

But never mind the French regionals and nationals. Here we are concerned purely with the British selection.

I think ITV Teletext has an interesting perspective. Their review of the programme reads:

While you're waiting for the final skate-off, flick over to BBC1 for a celebrity showdown of a different kind.
 
Six acts - whose CDs tend to be stacked up in the bargain bins these days - battle it out in a public vote for the right to compete in Helsinki in May.
 
Former East 17 bad boy Brian Harvey, wannabe glam-rocker Justin Hawkins and one-time Atomic Kitten Liz McClarnon are those taking to the mic. Tune in at 9.30 to see who's victorious.
The middle paragraph may sound harsh. Perhaps because it is not exactly untrue?
The thing about the skate-off is referring to some sort of celebrity ice dance final on ITV1. Below is Clare Buckfield (you may remember as the strong-willed daughter on 2.4 Children), erm, flying! Tickerbell meets Buffy, no?
Clare Buckfield flying...

 

Thankfully we don't have anybody ripping off Lordi.

 

These were downloaded and saved to harddisc at my local library. Nero Express was then used to burn the files to CD, and the harddisc copies thus erased (properly, not dumped in Recycle Bin). The songs were then transferred from CD to my little MP3 player, as it was easier than firing up WinAmp...
The following reviews are in my play order. I'm not sure why "Big Brovaz" is at the end of the list. It isn't alphabetical, or date, or file size. It appears to be random based upon the quadratic inverse triangulation of the phase of the moon...
Explorer view of MP3s

 

Flying The Flag (Scooch) [MP3]

This is a girl/boy band from the nineties (that I have absolutely no recollection of!) who have reformed to make something that sounds like a poppy Eurovision number crossed with an early Kylie. I quite like this one, even though the "flight attendant announcements" are slightly annoying, and for those of us with a less-than-pure mentality, somewhat perverted. I could swear he says at one stage "would you like something to suck on for landing, Sir?". Perhaps this innuendo is their little risque 'edge', along with what I would imagine will be cartoon-like hostess outfits for the girls.

 

I Can (Brian Harvey) [MP3]

This guy used to be the lead singer of East 17 (later E17).
I'm sorry, I find his voice painful to listen to, and with that whiney over-serious ex-boyband sound, it is just too much.
If this wins, the UK won't, but at least I'll have three minutes in the contest in which to go pee...

 

I'll Leave My Heart (Cyndi) [MP3]

This lovely little ballad sounds like a mélânge of Irish and Country - remember that song at the end of the film "Pearl Harbor" (Faith Hill, was it?)?
With France entering a franglais entry, it would be amusing to see a Frenchie representing the UK.
Credit where credit's due though, she can sing. I can see her as a younger, less Céline Dion-like version of Sandrine Françoise (France, 2002), with the obligatory stylish black dress.

 

They Don't Make 'Em Like They Used To (Justin Hawkins & Beverlei Brown) [MP3]

What a God-awful racket (though better than Brian Harvey). I never got the attraction of Hawkins' falsetto screeching, and not content with that - we have a soul singer screeching along with him... while Grace Kelly (Mika) is amusing and almost 'cute', Hawkins and Brown just wail.
Unfortunately this one is the bookie's favourite to win. What are they thinking?
What do I picture when I see this? I don't know. Justin is predictably unpredictable, so whatever it is will be over the top and verging on Elton John meets Wigwam (Norway 2005).

 

(Don't It Make You) Happy! (Liz McClarnon) [MP3]

An ex-Atomic Kitten singer putting in exactly the sort of song you'd expect. My complaint is the percussion (cymbals and timpani, it sounds like) are almost always lingering in the background. It sounds like a radio that is slightly off tuning.
I think this is aiming for the Katrina & The Waves ambience, but just hasn't got the oomph to pull it through. Katrina's song had a message. This is just asking, with horrible abuse of the English language (doesn't, Liz, the word is doesn't!), if it makes you happy. It's a teeny-bopper number not a winner.

 

Big Bro Thang (Big Brovaz) [MP3]

Well, it'd probably get votes from Denmark. I thought that the UK had maybe come to their senses and realised that while there are lots of genres in Eurovision, rap isn't really one that works. I mean, can you take seriously a bloke saying "wait a minute / let me spit you a lyric / I'm from the ghetto so I know how to live it". Doesn't exactly 'go', does it? Expecially if you put it into context of being sandwiched between... let's see, an incomprehensible song with a drum-banging Boonika and some syrupy boy-band quartet from Eastern Europe singing in a language that consists of no vowels whatsoever. Okay, those are entries from past years, but I can guarantee you Eurovisions in the future will contain similar weirdness, and a rap song just won't fit.
This one has also been released in a video form which has been played numerous times on Chart Show TV (Sky FTA #355).

 

My pick (from listening only)

It'll perhaps come down to televised performance. For me it's a dead heat between Flying The Flag (Scooch) and I'll Leave My Heart (Cyndi).

If it came to what song I would like to see represent the UK, anything culled from the current music scene - I'd be inclimed to choose How To Save A Life (The Fray) which is just such an amazing song. I think we ought to enter a feel-good song with a proper message (remember - it's how Katrina won), and what better?
It is unlikely to win, thanks to the insane capraciousness of the European public, however at least we won't come away thinking "oh my God, that was just a bad song"...

...like last year. Everybody slagging off poor Daz Sampson and the St. Trinians chicks (Did you know they are about to begin filming a new St. Trinians film, all these years later? I wonder what starlets will turn up in it... so far we have Lily Cole, Rupert Everett (as the headmistress), Russell Brand (ick), Colin Firth, Jodie Whittaker and Stephen Fry - a luvvies love-in?). We are all too quick to forget that he underwent a selection vote exactly like this one, and if his song was really that bad - it's the fault of the British public for choosing it in the first place.
Oh, and before you start coming up with ideas like "he was the best of the worst" and that all the entries sucked, remember that this is in no way Daz's fault. He, and other acts, performed. You picked him. And if there really was nothing better, shut up moaning and write something better yourself!
That's not to say it was a bad song in any case - after all, that awful Lithuanian attempt at tub-thumping passed the semis. Mmm, what was I saying about insane capriciousness? ☺

 

How I think the UK will pick

The bookies aren't right. Justin was on Comic Relief last night, yes, and there is a following for his bizarre antics, yes, so that 'exposure' is bound to win him votes, as - I would imagine - Big Brovaz having airplay for their song.
We can discount Liz - sorry, but your song sorta comes, happens, and goes without really leaving an impression. And we can discount Brian as the only impressions his song leaves in my mind would be subtitled with rows of asterisks.
The Scooch song is the most cheesy-pop "Eurovision" of the six entries, while Cyndi is the best singer of the lot. Let's hope they score highly, though I think for fun factor Scooch has the edge.

 

Making Your Own Mind Up

Download the songs and listen for yourself.
These songs are hosted on another site, which has nothing to do with HeyRick.

 


Wonky clock (left)  A week later...  Wonky clock (right)


 

The televised performances - March 17th 2007

These are in performance order.

We open with a whizzy title sequence which seems inspired by the Doctor Who title sequences of the seventies.

Eurovision - Making Your Mind Up title

Next we are introduced to our two hosts - Sir Terry Wogan, love him or hate him, he has been the face of Eurovision for so long (as long as I've been watching since the early eighties, if not since the contest began!) that it wouldn't be the same without his unique brand of commentary. And, the rising young presenter Fearne Cotton who was left in the cold when they pulled TOTP from the schedules. It's like a father-daughter show, isn't it?

Tel and Fer, our two hosts.

We are then shown a snippet of the UK's last entrant, and the last time the UK won exactly ten years ago...

Daz and the girls, UK entrant 2006. Katrina, UK entrant and winner 1997.

After a brief suggestion of how to pick a good Eurovision song, highlighting the weird and the hammy, we are on to the songs...

 

(Don't It Make You) Happy! (Liz McClarnon) [TV]

Liz McClarnon Liz McClarnon
With that hair, I'd not have recognised her from Atomic Kitten. It's a sing-along sort of song, provided you can skip over the repetitivity of some of it - the 'yeah's and the 'happy's. It'd be a good entry for the mindless.
The costume was colourful, if short and somewhat reminiscent of a big bluey-green marshmallow with legs. I liked what the backup singers were wearing, a chic simplicity.

 

This is when we discover the 'panel' to critique the song is Mel Giedroyc (with a silly hat) and John Barrowman (who was virtually unknown before being Captain Jack)...
John says it may not be a Eurovision song. Mel says she's more like "Gina G with funk", which proves she's with it and he isn't... I just wished Mel didn't keep saying "eurovishz" (in IPA that would be 'eurovishz' in phonetics), it isn't hard to add the "on" to the end of the word!

John and Mel

 

I Can (Brian Harvey) [TV]

Brian Harvey Brian Harvey
Dressed in black with sparkly bits, and a hairstyle that suggests he ought to have a dog called "Asbo", he goes on live television and shows his vocal limitations.
Okay, granted, I can't sing. At least I know better than to go on TV and make that noise.
Next.

 

Big Bro Thang (Big Brovaz) [TV]

Big Brovaz Big Brovaz
In the video we see somebody that looks like rap meets Marilyn Manson. Here, it's a guy with a hat. The female vocals sounded a bit warbly, but it wasn't a bad live rendition of the song. However... what were they wearing? In specific, the make-up.
I just don't know if this is a Eurovision song, even with the R'n'B twist. The UK has entered rap before, and it didn't do terribly well.

 

I'll Leave My Heart (Cyndi) [TV]

Cyndi Cyndi
Yup. She's French. Get over it, 'cos she's also the first performer of the evening that put in a performance worthy of voting for. It's a nice ballad. You really need to listen to this to understand what I mean.
As a Eurovision song, the performance style reminded me of typical entries from Malta and Croatia mixed together. Soft, gentle, and massively understated.
It went down with the panel, and even Terry Wogan. Thumbs up all around.
By the way, remember what I wrote a week ago (or a couple of minutes ago for you reading this!) about her being a younger Sandrine Françoise wearing a stylish black dress? Uh-hu?

 

Flying The Flag (Scooch) [TV]

Scooch Scooch
The blonde quips "it ain't easy bein' cheesy" in the intro montage, but after the introductions I still don't recognise them. Oh well.
Cheesy is the word. Totally. This is like a comedy Abba tribute group stuffed into Cabin Crew's outfits - it's even better than I imagined it would be, right down to the cartoon-like hostess dresses! For the girls, I think blue shoes, to match the rest of the uniform, might have been better. But whatever, this was unashamedly silly - I loved it!

 

They Don't Make 'Em Like They Used To (Justin Hawkins & Beverlei Brown) [TV]

Justin Hawkins and Beverlei Brown Justin Hawkins and Beverlei Brown
It starts off a reasonable soul number, and then Justin turns up looking like something out of Casanova (I would normally pass judgement on the costume - but with Justin I expect this!) and the screechy nonsense begins.
These two put on a performance, for sure. However if they represent the UK, the rest of Europe will think we all will need to be institutionalised!

 

My pick now

Well, I'm sorry to say I'm still undecided. I think it depends upon whether we just want to have a fun entry Flying The Flag (Scooch), or whether we want to stand a chance of winning, in which we should go with the amazing I'll Leave My Heart (Cyndi).
Cyndi waiting... Scooch waiting...

 

"Johnny Foreigner" picked...

In a first, they brought in people from each country taking part to do a quick poll of what song they think would be best. Their choice was: Mel was surprised not to see Scooch in the list (so was I), so John asks if we wish to send a pop song or a Eurovision song. Meanwhile Mel exercised an encylopædic knowledge of who, where, and when in Eurovision history, which surprises John (and even Sir Terry). Fearne says she is "Eurovishz geek chic".
John reacting to another of Mel's obscure facts

 

And the winner should be.....

In another change, there was to be a sing-off. Another phone vote, and more money for Children In Need.
Oh my goodness! The two acts singing for the place were the two that I picked - Scooch, and Cyndi. Whoo-hoo!

I think the biggest shock of the night is that the British public came to their senses and rejected the lesser songs. They got rid of Liz and Brian pretty quickly. I guess they may have been the ones with the least votes. It came down to Cyndi vs Big Brovaz and Justin/Beverlei vs Scooch.

When Cyndi was announced as the pick over Big Brovaz, they shook hands and departed the stage nicely. When Scooch was picked over Justin/Beverlei, Justin pretty much stormed off - but just before he did so we have this brief moment - now doesn't she look like he might have just said something unpleasant to her?

Justin vs Natalie

 

I'll Leave My Heart (Cyndi) [TV, 2nd time]

Cyndi Cyndi
This song was every bit as good as it was before, this time she was playing with the song a little on the long notes, perhaps to prove that she really can sing live - not that that was in doubt.
Cyndi

 

Flying The Flag (Scooch) [TV, 2nd time]

Scooch Scooch
Bright, colourful, cheesy bits dripping off and leaving gloopy yellow puddles on the floor (bring your own subtext!)
Scooch

 

It's the day of rockening

While waiting for the second televote to complete, the BBC invited the current Finnish winners Lordi to perform their song, albeit tinnier than I'd have expected (or was my Digibox playing up the audio?).
Lordi Lordi

 

My pick now

While Cyndi is the better performer, and while it would be interesting to see the UK represented by a Frenchie, I think the song that has more Eurovision appeal is the delightfully whimsical and silly Flying The Flag (Scooch).
So, perhaps against my better judgement, I'll pick Scooch.

I can console myself that the subtleties of Cyndi's song would probably be lost in Eurovision. She can have better luck with radio/TV airplay and a chart position as a serious song.

 

And the winner (finally) is.....

So the two finalists are side by side.
Awaiting the result

After the obligatory long pause for dramatic effect (only now, doing that is a boring cliché well demonstrated by Philip Schofield during the Dancing On Ice final), Fearne announces the winner is Scooch while at the same time Sir Terry calls it for Cyndi.
Now, I suspect Sir Tel may have a 'thing' for French girls - so perhaps he had something else in mind when he called her name? ☺
It was up to Fearne to say "sorry darling" to Cyndi (how horrific for her! (Cyndi, I mean)) and quickly correct the mistake. The expressions on Scooch's faces probably match those of many viewers...

Confused! Happy, but still confused.

In any case - Britain has picked the song I felt they would right from the beginning. Good on them!
If only they were that good when it came to The Vote... ☺

 

So it was time for Sir Terry and Fearne (now wearing a nicer dress, but tuck it away sweetheart) to sign off, reminding us when the semi and the final will be on.

Byebye!

Scooch get to perform their, winning, song again. If nothing else, the BBC certainly got their money out of these guys! Three performances in about an hour...

Scooch, the winners Scooch, the winners
Scooch, the winners Scooch, the winners

 

As we fade to black at the end of the programme...

Scooch
They introduced themselves before the first performance. It is, left to right: the Fragma girl, Shane Warne, Lisa from Steps, and an eighties boy band reject.
No, seriously: Caroline, Russ, Natalie, and David. In case you, like, care. Or something...

 

Now show them your support - as their zany cheesefest is the British entry for 2007. And judging by the sneak preview, it looks like our main competition is going to be the eleventh outing for the girl from Malta, and the French franglais entry.
As for the rest, there was once a time when a 'tranny' was a sort of radio. Now it's something you'll see on Eurovision.

If you missed the sneak preview, you'll see what I mean, soon...

 

 

But the excitement doesn't end there...

According to the BBC, Sir Terry was given the correct information over his earpiece. But, you know, studios are noisy and so on. They aren't blaming Sir Terry (no, that's our job! ☺).

I've not seen a report, but I've seen commentary that would suggest that Justin Hawkins is/has/might have accused the British voters of being racist. Perhaps in his mind he sings well. In our minds, he messed the song up by opening his mouth. As for Big Brovaz, are we racist or do we just not think rap's where it's at?
Furthermore, to flog a dead donkey, I think it is highly racist of Justin to even come up with a view such as this. I mean, what's the deal here? His golden voice, manliness, impreccable dress sense, and a black bird singing with him so he's ticked all the boxes and is guaranteed a winner? Come on...

Meanwhile ITV's teletext is reporting:

Lying the flag (entertainment news p142 5/11 20h34UK 2007/03/20)
Eurovision entrants Scooch have been accused of duping the public after it emerged they had backing singers hidden off the stage when they performed their winning song.
The four-piece band won BBC1's Making Your Mind Up contest on Saturday to become the UK's entry with Flying The Flag (For You).
Every act was allowed backing singers - but Scooch put theirs out of sight.
Given that most backing singers stand in the darkness at the back of the stage, to hide them isn't a crime, though I did wonder if there were backing singers at one point as there seemed to me to be too many voices towards the end.
I think what it'll come down to is: It sounds a little bit naughty, but I'm actually surprised we're fifty-odd years into the contest before somebody tried hiding the backup singers.

 

 

The Graham Norton Show BBC 2, 22nd March 2007

The winner of the UK National Selection would be expected to make some television appearances, one of which was to play out The Graham Norton Show.

Upon seeing them, Graham remarked "For the first time ever, I''m not the gayest thing on my own show!", and when it came time to hand over to them to play the programme out, Graham did so saying "Here's this year's Eurovision entry - it's Cyndi! no, I mean Scooch!".

Gayer than Graham the "professional lush"? Wow! There ought to be an award for that... A fairly irrelevant picture just so I could drop in the programme information banner.
Go blow! The end, with the flags'n'stuff.

I had wondered if I was possibly misinterpreting something in this song, but Graham's audience confirmed it - this song has some rather pervy bits in it. Yes the man does say "would you like something to suck on for landing, Sir?", and he holds up something that may be totally innocent, but it sure looks like a condom. As for the blonde motioning how to put on the life vest, pull firmly on the red cord, and blow into the mouthpiece... yeah, I think I'll let the emphasis in that sentence speak for itself.

You'll notice the final two pictures are the same scenes as used in the play-out of the selection competition. It's because I happen to think they make pretty good visuals. The song is cheesy for sure, but it has a lot of visual stuff going on.
The left, the blonde (Caroline) doing her 'blow' routine, and she pulls it off, unlike a certain Sinead-inspired-Britney who, in her airpline hostess video had a lame song and who was that she kept kissing? Madonna? In any case, I found this part of the song to be amusing. I know, small minds... whatever.
The right, I like the way the meal trolley things turn in to two flags, with the low angle shot as they walk forwards from it. It doesn't quite have the same dramatic power as "Lejla" (Bosnia & Herzegovina 2006), but that's because nobody expects this song to be taken that seriously. And besides, this may be one of the last years in which the Union flag will be viable, so enjoy it while it is still around...

 

 

The Graham Norton Show (repeat) BBC 2, 25th March 2007

The repeat shown on Sunday night also included a discussion with Scooch that was not included in the version broadcast on Thursday. A transcript (with lots of 'ehr's omitted) follows:
[before the song]
Graham  : Did everyone watch "Making Your Mind Up" to find the British
          Eurovision entry, did you watch it?

          You couldn't make it up, could you?

          Now, Terry Wogan... Ah Terry, I love ya! I love ya!
          But he did make a bit of a mess of announcing the winner.

          [to female guest] You didn't see this, it was extraordinary.

Jessie  : I've heard of it though.

Graham  : At the end of the show, he announced that Cyndi (which probably
          means something in Welsh), uh, Cyndi had won, instead of Scooch.

          Now he blamed a technical malfunction.
          Technically, he should have given a t**s.

          [imitates a Mr. Bean-like person] Mmm, mmm, Cyndi, I dunno...

          Now the winning group were Scooch, here's a picture of Scooch.
          Look at them! They're delighted to be going off to Finland!

          Never mind the airline stewards. Honestly, they got so drunk
          after winning the contest that they could have been pilots!

          That's how happy they were!

          Ladies and gentlemen, they're here. Please welcome Scooch!

[the group enter]

Graham  : Yay Scooch!
          For the first time ever, I am not the gayest thing on my own
          show.

          Now Scooch are going to play us out, so please say thank you to
          my guests: Euan Griffiths and Jessie Wallace!

          [blah blah about the video podcast on the website, I couldn't
           hear this clearly over the clapping]

          Now here's this year's Eurovision entry, it's Cyndi!
          No, I mean Scooch!

          Goodnight everybody, bubye!

[Scooch perform their song, to giggles in all the right places by Graham's
 audience, thus confirming that the lyrics are a little bit you-know-what]


[after the song]

Graham  : Oh, come to me Scooch!
          Oh, I love... Even as it's going on, you don't quite believe it!

          I can't wait to see it on the night!

Caroline: I can't believe it's allowed!

Graham  : Nor can I.
          It is genius.

          Now Scooch, Scooch, you have been controversial this week, not
          only the bad who won thing... How was that poor cow Cyndi
          afterwards?

          [Caroline speaks but her mic isn't operating]

Russ    : She was fine. I think she thought we... I think she didn't
          realise we won either because I think we both heard different...
          She thought she'd lost because Fearne said she'd lost. It was a
          bit confusing.

Caroline: She took it really well actually, and Terry apologised after and
          she was absolutely fine.

Graham  : What was it? Was he just not listening?

Russ    : There was loads of people shoutin' and that, I just don't know.
          Live TV, anything can happen I suppose.

Caroline: Who knows?

Graham  : And now, talk us through the miming thing then.

Natalie : [laughs]

David   : [pretends to mime a reply]

Russ    : Well, basically the rules of the competition, and for Eurovision
          as well, is that you're allowed six people to take part in your
          act.

Caroline: Yeah.

Russ    : And it's your choice whether you have backing singers on-stage
          or... off-stage. For some reason they thought... um, you know,
          our backing singers are off-stage, they're over there, and,
          and...

Graham  : So your backing singers are off stage?

Caroline: Yes.

Graham  : Have we got a camera on them?

          [cut to two people dressed in black, standing by microphones;
           the two female backing singers wave, looking somewhat bemused]

Graham  : Wait, I don't understand, did you run out of blue material?

Russ    : They'd get run over.

Graham  : Why don't you dress them up as...?

Caroline: They would get run over...

David   : On that stage...

Caroline: ...all that stuff.

David   : ...it's tiny.

Graham  : I love it when they turn around and it's a flag... Always a
          Buck's Fizz moment, isn't it?

          D'you think... d'you think you're gonna do well?

Caroline: Oh, I hope so!

Russ    : It's been ten years since the UK have won, so we, you know, we
          just wanna bring pop back to Eurovision.
          Last year it was a rap record, the year before it was a sort of
          like Latino thing. It's time to bring pop back, yeah.

Natalie : Time for a good old fashioned pop.

Graham  : It is very pop. It is very pop. It's quite a... yes...
          And...

Caroline: Pop, Pop...

Graham  : Now are you going... is it coming out... it's going to be a
          single and everything?

Russ    : Yeah.

Caroline: It was released yesterday.

Russ    : It's for download yeah, so you can get it from iTunes from
          yesterday.

Graham  : Euan, d'you want to go to the computer and, eh, download this
          see?

Euan    : Fine.
          [cut to Euan moving the pointer around, so obviously not a geek!]

Graham  : Actually, why is Wales... Wales can't enter can they? Ireland
          can! You're just UK. This is you too?

Euan    : Yes indeed.

Graham  : You must be very proud!

Euan    : I'm delighted.

Graham  : When is it, by the way?

Russ    : May the 12th

Caroline: 12th of May, yup.

Graham  : Seriously, good luck to you. I think it would be so good, and
          funny, if you won. It would be quite, it would...

Natalie : We'll come back and sing it again for you.

Graham  : Oh, can you imagine, and the flags and everything.

David   : Oh well we're changing it for Helsinki. We're getting a diff...
          that's a bit... might not go down very well if we turn it around
          and...

Caroline: It's a bit patriotic.

Graham  : So what flag's going to be on there now? Ryanair?

          [everybody is talking at once, I can't make out what is being
           said...]

Graham  : So you're going to have all the European flags?
          Are you going to have huge trolleys, like that?

          Now then ladies and gentlemen, please would... Scooch!
          All the luck in the world in Helsinki.

          Good luck, thank you, and please thank Euan Griffiths and Jessie
          Wallace...
This is my transcription, tidied a little. Errors are my mishearing or other random cluelessness...

Well, what can I say? The policital correctness brigade have marched in. In the 2006 semi final, Lordi took to the stage with a Finland flag hat.
Yet, now, Scooch are Flying The Flag, only they aren't flying the flag that the British people voted for. The unveiling of the Union flag is what drew the cheers - now suddenly we can wave byebye to the flag...

Thanks guys. Nice to see you have the balls to pull it off. Now what was Cyndi's phone number?

 

 


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Text copyright © 2007 Rick Murray (except Graham Norton transcript)
Images copyright © 2007 BBC / ITV